Parent’s Corner -Not So Thankful at Thanksgiving

Blue Angry Bird


Dear Sue Ellen,

My sister-in-law is the most controlling person I have ever seen.  Whenever she comes over the first thing she does is adjust the thermostat of my house. She orders us to all be very quiet when she puts her baby down for a nap.  Her son is just an infant and she is already telling us what we can and cannot say around him.  I hate it when they come over and yesterday she told my husband they are planning to spend Thanksgiving weekend with us.  I can’t think of one thing about their visit that I will be thankful for.  Is there any gracious way to get out of this?



Dear S.B.

Here are some suggestions for getting out of having your sister-in-law’s family visit Thanksgiving weekend:

Lying is a weak option. You need a truthful reason.  Make plans to go out of town for the weekend and tell them you won’t be home.  Then leave town and visit a distant relative.

This suggestion may cost you a little so you’ll have to decide if it is worth the investment.   Burn the turkey.

This option is much more involved and requires a long-term commitment. Go to the pound and adopt a dog or cat. Tell them your new puppy or kitten needs an adjustment period before anyone comes over.

Get your husband to blame you and say you don’t want any guests for the weekend.  If you are lucky, they will stay mad at you for a few months; or at least long enough to get you through the next few weeks.

Extended family members visiting can be stressful, especially during the holidays.  Whatever you decide to do about your sister-in-law, try to have peace, and allow time to reflect on things you are thankful for.  If they come over for the weekend anyway, watch the old movie ‘Mary Poppins’.  There is a good life lesson in the song she sings: “A spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down”.  So when your sister-in-law has been with you for a couple of days and you are ready to screech at her and pull her hair out, remember that little song.  I hope it helps.   Happy Thanksgiving!




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